Where Is Your Heart?
by AngieeeB
Summary: It's hard to believe in things you can't see. How is Brooke supposed to believe in Lucas' love? Mainly Brucas with Naley and possibly Jeyton. BPH friendship. I'm not good with summaries. Rating may change with a warning.
1. Things That You Say Are Hard To Believe

Note: I'm not sure how long this is going to be, but this definitely going to be more than a few chapters. This will be one of my longer fanfictions. I know the beginning is starting out with Brooke being against being with Lucas but I assure you I am a huge Brucas fan and they'll be together by at least the 3rd chapter. Some chapters will start out with Journal entries by Brooke. It was Haley's idea for her to start one. The journal entries will mostly be based on songs. If you're ever interested in which song it is feel free to ask. Sometimes the chapter name will be the song, sometimes it won't. Okay, so on with the story. A little FYI for you all, I love reviews. The more I get, the more I update, you could call them motivation. Sorry if this chapter is short, they'll get longer as I discover if people actually like this or not.

Disclaimer: Although I'd love to own the cast and such… I don't.

**Things That You Say are Hard to Believe**

_October 17, 2005_

_Ever since that night at the beach, everything in my head has changed. Not that I've come to some big realization, because trust me, been there, done that. The past few days I've spent hours of my life trying to forget what he said but it keeps ringing in my mind. "I'm the guy for you Brooke Davis, you'll see." I mean what was he trying to do, trap me? In a way I'm happy he said those words, I'm sure the smile on my face gave that away but I can't help but be… afraid. How can he expect me to trust that he won't hurt me, that our love would be everlasting?  
It's so hard to believe in things you can't see for yourself. Back when Haley and Nathan were together, when they were happy, in love, I would have accepted what Lucas said. But now everything is different. Haley and Nathan aren't together, she ran off to join that clown because she got scared. Sure she said it was because she wanted to pursue her career, but I know that look in her eyes. It's the same look I get every time I look at Lucas. She was afraid. Fear. Whose idea was it to give us a fear gene? I think he or she should suffer like we do. How am I supposed to believe in love if everywhere I look I see pain or resentment? With Nathan and Haley it's pain. He looks at her and remembers what heartache he went through with the whole Chris fiasco. When she looks at him she sees his pain, the non-existent trust and that hurts her. My parents, even though they don't admit it, resent each other… and me. My father wanted a boy; my mother didn't want a kid at all. She gave in, I was a girl. She married my dad for his money not for love. Love is not something I see often, if ever. Sure in movies they give you these perfect stories with perfect people but it's not reality, life is nothing like that at all. All around me I see lonely people with pain in their eyes and fake smiles on their faces, just like I see when I look at myself in the mirror. Can you sit here and tell me one person in my life that has made it through with someone who loved them in return? Peyton? Nope Jake left. Haley? No she left. Nathan? Haley hurt him. Lucas? I'm too scared to admit how I feel. Mouth? Erica dumped him. Karen? Dan crushed her, Andy and she didn't work out. Dan and Deb? Ha, they're getting divorced. I hate that word… Divorce. What's the point of marrying someone if you intend to break it off when things get rough? Exactly, there is no point.  
Deep down, behind the makeup and the designer clothes lies a broken heart. Lucas Scott did that to me. This whole mess never would have happened if he hadn't cheated, if I hadn't let him back in. Letting him back in wasn't a mistake though, it gave me the chance to love again, love him again. During junior year of high school we spent many days together, falling back into our old friendship. We became friends, friends with a rocky past. I'm not even sure how it happened really. Sometimes I wish it hadn't, so I wouldn't be feeling this way. It isn't fair to me and especially isn't fair to him. Behind my façade of cheeriness lies more than I can understand, much more than I can understand. Everything's just so mixed up. I'm like one big jumble of feelings on the inside.  
Lucas tells me things will be different. That he wants to be with me, no matter what. Everything I want to hear, he tells me. It's not going to be okay. It's too much for me. I want to believe that he's right. I want to believe that everything will be perfect between us, that all we need is love. That's just not the case. I can't believe it. The more I want to believe it the less I do. I live in fear because of it. Fear of loss, fear of rejection, fear of getting hurt. I can't take the hurt anymore, the pain in my heart. He drives me crazy; he makes me safe and scared at the same time. How screwed up is that? Haley says its love. Psh, doesn't she know I already know that? I'm in love with Lucas and she knows that. The things he tells me, the things he does to me, it's his fault damnit. It's so hard to believe in him, believe in what he has to say. Sure his love is the best thing that's ever happened to me, but… there is no but. For once in my life I don't have something to contradict that with. Loving Lucas and being loved by him is the best thing that has ever happened to me. I just don't know what to do about it. I don't know how to let him past my barrier. I can't break down the fear. I hate it, I hate the fear. I just want to love him. It's so hard to do._

_Brooke_

"Done yet?" Haley softly asked from across the bedroom.

Brooke looked up from the fluffy pink notebook and smiled halfheartedly at Haley, "Yeah. Unless I plan on writing one of those stupid P.S. type things."

Haley laughed a little, "I'm glad you decided to take my advice and write in one of those. It could really help you."

Brooke shrugged and opened the drawer on her nightstand, placing the book and the purple pen inside, "You read it you die."

"I wouldn't dream of it," Haley commented. "Let's go. We're going to get something to eat at Karen's. _Someone _forgot to go grocery shopping."

Brooke coughed, "Excuse me. It was your turn this week."

Haley rolled her eyes and walked over to Brooke's bed. She took hold of her arm and pulled her up, "Let's go."

Brooke groaned and stood up, "Fine. I'm coming. Gosh."

Haley smiled and let go of Brooke's arm heading out of the bedroom. Brooke grabbed her purse and followed behind her.

It didn't take long for the two to get to Karen's, especially with Brooke driving.

* * *

"Are you alright Brooke? You look a little upset," Karen said as she placed water in front of the 2 girls at the counter.

Brooke shrugged and glanced up at Haley, "You may do the honors while I escape to the bathroom." She stood up and headed for the back of the café where the bathrooms were.

Karen looked to Haley for the answer to her question, not sure if she wanted to hear the answer or not. Haley nodded her head, "She's upset alright. All she does is mope. I swear she's turned into a brooder, Luke's rubbing off on her."

Karen frowned, "What's got her so upset?"

"Your son," Haley replied.

"I was afraid you'd say that. What did he do to her?"

"He told her she was **the one**."

"Why would that be upsetting?"

"Karen, you know I love Lucas but he really does have the worst timing with things. She's afraid that he'll hurt her again and dumping something like that on her… she wasn't prepared."

Karen nodded, "Yeah. Do you want me to talk to him? Have him lay off her a bit?"

Haley laughed, "No. Don't talk to him. He needs to press harder on her. Time isn't what she needs. She needs reassurance."

Brooke returned a few seconds later, "Have fun talking about me?"

Karen touched Brooke's shoulder, "Cheer up Brooke. We all miss your smile."

Brooke laughed and sat down on her stool again, "Thanks."

"I'll get you girls your cheeseburgers." Karen replied as she walked away into the kitchen.

Haley smiled at Brooke, "You know you'll be happy in a few days when you finally realize you're in love with Lucas. If you'd just give him those damn letters everything would be alright."  
"It's not that simple Tutor Girl. I know I love him. Hell the state of California knows I love him. I can't loose him again; I can't set myself up for disaster."

Haley shook her head, "No. Brooke you're not going to loose him."

Brooke shrugged, "Suddenly I'm not so hungry." She stood up and dropped a 5 dollar bill on the table, dropping the car keys beside it for her, "Just bring the cheeseburger home for me okay? I'm going to go for a walk. I'll see you later." Brooke leaned down and kissed Haley's cheek as a goodbye and left the café. She wasn't exactly sure where she was going but she needed to get away from Haley. Not just Haley, anyone that would try to convince her that Lucas was going to be there, that he wasn't going to leave her. She headed back to the apartment first to change. She undressed and started to go through her closet. She threw on a grey shirt from Abercrombie and a short jean Ezra Fitch skirt. She slipped on a pair of white Juicy flip-flops, put one of her big beaded necklaces around her neck and left the apartment. The mall would be a great place to let off her frustrations, even if she didn't plan on buying anything. Her parents had sent her a new credit card since they'd become rich again. A new shirt or 2 wouldn't hurt.


	2. I'm Not Okay I Promise

Note: LuvAngel448, CrazyAznChik, brookeandlucasforever, charley075, and PaulineJ: Thank you all for leaving your thoughts, it means a lot.

lac18: The whole story at first was going to be based on journal entries by Brooke in the beginning of each chapter, but I changed my mind. Some chapters will include a journal entry, some will not. The journal will play out its purpose in the end with help from Haley. You're not the only one who loves Karen . I love that she has a daughter/mother type thing going on with Brooke and she will be in this story as much as I can throw her in. She won't be the annoying mother like most people play her out to be in their stories. Thanks for your review.

* * *

**I'm Not Okay – I Promise**

Stylishly dressed Brooke didn't bother to wait for Haley to return home with the car. Walking wouldn't kill her, even if it was a few miles to the mall. If it really got that bad she'd just call Peyton to come and pick her up. She had no doubt that she'd make it there and back in once piece, after all she was Brooke. It took her a half an hour to get there, but Sunrise Mall was definitely worth it. She opened the large glass door and headed inside. Take a left and head towards Abercrombie or make a right for American Eagle or just head straight for Hollister. The more money she spent the better she tended to feel. Brooke turned on her heel and headed for the left, Abercrombie was definitely the most expensive. After spending 10 minutes staring at a turquoise "Not Tied Down (Maybe Later)" t-shirt she decided to buy it. She picked up a small and placed it on her arm. '_Jeans or a skirt?' _She thought to herself. '_Jeans, definitely.'_ She headed towards the back of the store, only to be stopped by a worker, "Can I help you with anything Miss?" Brooke turned around to face the person so she could politely decline until she noticed the guy was totally gorgeous, "Um sure. Jeans… Ezra Fitch definitely, I'm thinking destroyed. Any suggestions?"

"A girl with money in her wallet," he smiled, "Follow me."

The dark haired guy in front of her slid past her and started towards a shelf filled with jeans. Brooke followed behind him, reaching him just as he pulled out a pair of Ezra Fitch Premium Destroyed boot-cut jeans in a washed out color. Brooke pondered them for a second before nodding, "Perfect. Thank you." She picked up a pair of them in a size 0.

"Anything else?" He asked.

Brooke smiled, "Well if you're in a helpful mood you could direct me to the sweatshirts." Who was she kidding? She knew exactly where they were. She'd only been inside this store a zillion times before and somehow the guy knew that.

He just smiled and led her over, "Buying an outfit for anything special?"

Brooke shook her head, "Trying to get my mind off some things."

"And you're doing this by burning a hole in your credit card?"

"Yeah, it's a bad habit I guess." Actually it wasn't a bad habit, she liked that habit. Why in the hell was she flirting with this guy? She glanced over the rack of sweaters, a white one… As if reading her mind the guy beside her picked up a white sweatshirt, in 2 different styles, one was a Megan Logo one with Abercrombie written across the chest and the other was a lighter one in Molly Style. She already had the Abercrombie one so took the Molly one from his hand thanking him.

"Sure you're not buying all this for a date? Something special with your boyfriend?"

Brooke shook her head, "No. No, I don't have a boyfriend." _'Although I would if I'd just stop being an idiot.' _She added to herself.

"I'd think a pretty girl like you would have a ton of guys on her wait list."

Brooke laughed, "Let's not go there. Don't you think your girlfriend would be jealous of you calling another girl pretty? You must not go to Tree Hill High."

"Senior… I just transferred down here and nope I don't have a girlfriend," he replied.

"Senior too," Brooke answered deciding she'd had enough of Abercrombie and of the gorgeous guy in front of her. Even though he was hot and typical Brooke would've already given her number, he wasn't Lucas.

She headed for the cash register, the guy still behind her. He headed behind the register and took the things from her arm, "I'll ring you up."

Brooke nodded and reached for her purse. She took out her credit card and placed it on the counter.

"Your total is $252," He told her.

Brooke pointed to the credit card.

"Brooke Davis. Pretty name," he said as he looked the card over before scanning it, "Sign the screen."

Brooke nodded and did as he said, taking the card from him, "It's only fair that I know your name."

He smiled, "Oh right. Sure. Ryder. Ryder Scott."

Brooke froze, "Scott?"

He nodded, "Scott."

"As in Dan Scott Motors?"

"Unfortunately, he's my uncle."

Brooke shook her head; no matter how hard she tried she couldn't escape the Scotts. She must be cursed, "Okay wow. Thanks for your help, bye." She grabbed the bag off the counter and quickly left the store. Can't escape Lucas, can't escape Nathan and now there's another one, another hottie to add to the bunch, Ryder.

Suddenly she wasn't in the mood to shop any longer, a feeling Brooke rarely felt. She whipped out her cell phone and dialed Peyton. No answer. Haley? No answer. _'Is this your way of telling me to talk to Lucas?' _Brooke thought looking up at the ceiling. She rolled her eyes and held down the number 4 on her phone. After all this she still hadn't taken him off speed dial. She pressed the phone to her ear and waited. It only took 4 rings for him to answer, "Brooke. Hey."

She laughed to the ceiling, "Hi Luke."

"What's up?"

"Are you busy?" Brooke asked glancing down at her watch, it was 7:30 what could be possibly be doing at 7:30 at night… besides playing basketball.

"I was just shooting some hoops with Skills why?"

She knew him too well, "Well I'm at the mall. I kind of bailed on Haley before and headed here without the car. You think you could ditch Skills for 20 minutes and bring me home? Haley and Peyton didn't answer or I wouldn't have bothered you."

Lucas smiled, finally, "Sure. I'll be there in 10 minutes."

"Thanks Luke," Brooke said with a sigh. She headed towards the front of the mall, stopping to look in the window of American Eagle. There was a really cute top she'd have to come back and buy. She left the mall and sat down on one of the benches outside to wait for him. Like he'd said 10 minutes later he was walking up to the mall, having parked in the parking lot. He sat down beside her on the bench with a sigh, "Hey pretty girl."

Brooke smiled slightly, "Luke."

"I drive all this way and all I get is a 'Luke'?" He questioned teasingly.

Brooke smiled, "Sorry Broody Boy. Ready to take me home?"

Lucas nodded, "Sure. What'd you buy?" He stood up to take the Abercrombie bag from her.

She handed it to him and got up, "A shirt, a pair of jeans and a sweater."

"Somewhere around 200 dollars right?" He joked as he headed towards his car.

"250," Brooke replied with a nod. Why was this so awkward? Before she'd probably hug him and kiss him but now, after he told her what he'd told her at the beach, everything was weird.

"What made you come to the mall?"

Brooke shook her head, "Don't worry about it. I'm fine now."

Lucas shrugged and unlocked his car as they got to it. He opened the door for her, put her bag in the back and went around to the driver's side. Brooke got in the car and shut her door, buckling herself in. He started up his car and started to pull out of the parking spot. Brooke made the radio louder and put on the Hit Music station to avoid conversation with him.

* * *

15 minutes later Brooke was sitting on the living room couch, Lucas beside her watching television. Haley, who would be getting a slap in the face later, had invited Lucas to stay over while they watched their movie and he accepted. Haley had good intentions, but Brooke felt she needed to back off a bit. She'd go to Lucas in her own time.

"Okay, now what are we going to watch? We've got chick flicks and we've got The Ring 2," Haley said as she walked in front of the TV, "I vote for the Ring since Lucas is here and he can protect us from Samara."

Brooke shot Haley a warning glance and Haley smiled, "Yep, I'm for the Ring."

Brooke rolled her eyes at her, "Fine."

Haley nodded and put the DVD into the DVD player. She turned off the lights and climbed onto the couch beside Brooke, pushing her closer to Lucas. Lucas put his arm around the back of the couch, making room for Brooke and Haley. At the first shot she got Haley screamed, clutching Brooke for dear life, making her fall over into Lucas. She hadn't been scared, just took it as the perfect opportunity to push them together. Lucas put his arm around Brooke's shoulders so he could gently touch his best friend's shoulder, "Calm down Hales she didn't even come out yet."

Haley smiled slightly and nodded, moving a bit away from the two with a yawn, "I think I'm going to go to bed before I get nightmares."

Brooke glanced to the kitchen, "Haley… It's 8 o'clock."

Haley nodded and yawned once more, "Yeah and I woke up at 4 unlike you. Night you two." She kissed both Brooke and Lucas on the cheek and headed into her bedroom, "Make sure she doesn't scream too loud Luke. She's easily scared."

Lucas nodded, "She's safe with me."

'_Did they plan this or something?' _Brooke asked herself glancing between Luke and Haley. They were both smiling and Haley looked all but tired, "Night Tutor Girl."

It was 10:30 PM when the movie finally ended, Brooke was practically on Lucas' lap, his arms were around her and she was hiding in his chest. "Is it over yet?"

Lucas laughed at her and nodded, "Yeah. They're rolling the credits now."

"Good," she said moving her head away from his chest, "Sorry."

"It's okay. You know I like holding you," Lucas replied.

Brooke bit her bottom lip and shook her head, "It's late. You should probably go."

Lucas nodded, "If that's what you want."

"Lucas…"

"What Brooke? You tell me to leave, I agree, what do you want me to say?"

"I don't know. I don't know what I want," Brooke replied with a sigh.

Lucas shook his head and pressed his lips against hers for a split second.

"You shouldn't have done that."

"Why shouldn't-"

She cut him off by kissing him again. He knew she was addicted to his kisses. How could he use that against her? That was just cruel. She'd never do that to him… well maybe she would. Lucas' hand moved up her back, slipping into her hair as he pulled her closer to him. She had to stop him, but why couldn't she? _'Duh idiot you're in love with the guy' _Brooke reminded herself as she got her fingers tangled in the hair on the back of his neck. Lucas pressed his hand against the small of her back, pulling her lower body closer to him as he opened his mouth, pressing his tongue against her lower lip. Her mouth opened for him as she let her own tongue come in contact with his.

"Whoa…" Haley commented as she opened the refrigerator, "I wasn't expecting you two to start playing tonsil hockey."

Brooke turned red, something she rarely did and pulled away from Lucas, "Damnit Haley!"

"What?" Haley asked in an innocent voice as she grabbed a glass of water.

"You. Bedroom. Now." Brooke demanded pointing at Haley. Haley placed the glass on the counter and threw up her arms signaling she had given up. Brooke shot her a look and Haley ran for the bedroom.

"Do you want me to go?" Lucas asked her.

Brooke responded by kissing him softly. She got off of his lap and headed for the bedroom.

Lucas looked confused, was that a goodbye kiss or a 'stay right there' kiss? Damn that girl.

Brooke shut the bedroom door behind her and glanced at Haley's bed, "Pretending to sleep isn't going to get you anywhere."

Haley didn't answer; she just squeezed her eyes shut tighter.

Brooke playfully slapped Haley's head and groaned, "You are the worst pretender ever. You planned this didn't you?"

"What can I say? I hate to see you mope," Haley complained laughing at Brooke as she flipped over to face her.

"Jerk. You read my journal didn't you?" Brooke asked accusingly.

"Brooke there's one entry, what could possibly be worth reading?"

"How do you know there's only one?"

"You just wrote today!"

"You've got a point."

Haley flipped back over in the bed, her back facing Brooke, "If you plan on letting Lucas stay over, I have one request. You stay out there with him."

Brooke rolled her eyes, "I'm not sleeping with him."

"Sure," Haley replied shutting her eyes, "Night Brooke."

Brooke rolled her eyes and left the bedroom. She was mad at Haley, she was actually pretty damn happy she'd done this. It didn't mean she was going to get back with Lucas, because one night of him holding her wasn't going to ease her fears but it would help. She needed the little pushes, in the end that'd be the most helpful thing for her. She just wished she had the courage to let Lucas know that she loved him; it wasn't fair to lead him on when she really wasn't. She was trying to be with him, the only way she could right now.

"Did you want me to go?" Lucas asked looking up at Brooke when he heard her walk back into the living room.

Brooke shook her head, "No. Actually I didn't. Could you stay over tonight? Or do you think your mom would flip out on you?"

Lucas shrugged as he placed the now folded blanket on the back of the couch, "Depends. Do we plan on sleeping?"

Brooke laughed, "I just want you to hold me, tell me everything's going to be okay… even if it isn't."

"That I can do," Lucas replied walking over to her. She wrapped her arms around him and placed a kiss on his neck. He placed his hands on her hips and kissed the side of her head, "Are you okay Brooke?"

She looked up at him and shook her head, "Truthfully?"

Lucas nodded.

"No."

He sighed and kissed her forehead. She took his hand in her own and led him to the bedroom. Neither bothered to change as the crawled into Brooke's bed. He got into bed behind her, his placed arms around her. Brooke's body pressed up against his and both moved to face each other. She initiated what happened next, her lips moved to his for the kiss. He didn't dare stop her. Both knew that no matter how much kissing they did tonight their problem wasn't over. Brooke was still scared and it'd take a lot more than a few kisses and his strong arms around her to assure her that everything would be okay. After what seemed like an hour long kiss, Lucas finally spoke, "I know I hurt you Brooke. But we can do this. We can make it, we will make it."

Brooke smiled her voice cracking as she spoke, "I'm afraid." There it was, she said it, finally.

"Brooke I-"

"I'm afraid of getting my heart broken again, like before. Cause you hurt me so bad. I'm afraid to be vulnerable and I'm afraid of you. Afraid of the way you make me feel. And I know I shouldn't be, but I can't help it. I can't help it. This is how I've spent the past few months, wanting you. I've just been too scared to admit it." Tears were falling freely from her eyes as she spoke, letting herself open up to him. She needed this and frankly so did he.

"I know I hurt you last time we were together but-"

"I love you." Finally, she said it.

"I love you too… pretty girl."

She smiled as he leaned in, placing yet another searing kiss on her lips. Their relationship was far from over but far from being fixed.

* * *

Note: The little bit up there is almost a direct quote from the show, but of course I had to edit it a bit because Brooke didn't sleep with Chris in here. For those of you who haven't figured it out yet, this takes place a few days after the beach thing so obviously there is no Rachel. Sure the whole thing with Abercrombie seems random. At first it was but then something popped into my head. At first it was going to be Jake who turned up behind her but that would just make Jake seem like the bad guy and I don't like Jake as a bad guy. He just doesn't seem like one. He'll be here soon enough. Once I can think of a way to bring him back, any suggestions? And a little FYI, we haven't seen the last of Dan's nephew Ryder Scott. 


	3. Fixed Hearts to Battlefields

Note: Thanks to all the people who left reviews, it means a lot. As you all know, Christmas Eve is tomorrow night, so I won't be updating tomorrow. If I get enough reviews I will write as much as I can on Christmas Day and try and have another chapter out then. I'm going away on Monday and won't be around for a week so I won't be updating until January. So lots of reviews update by Monday. This was kind of a filler chapter, I had to bring something up and this was my way of doing it.

* * *

**Fixed Hearts to Battlefields**

"Damnit!" Haley exclaimed as she tripped over the dresser, stubbing her toe in the process. She groaned when she noticed Brooke's sheets start to move. Haley quietly crept out of the bedroom so she wouldn't wake up Brooke; she had another half hour or so to sleep. Haley had a tendency to wake up early, something you'd have to do if you were sharing a shower with Brooke.

"What was that?" Brooke groggily asked Lucas as her eyes slowly fluttered open. Lucas had already woken up; he had been watching Brooke sleep. "Lucas?"

"Yeah. I'm here. It was Haley," Lucas replied with a nod.

Brooke smiled and looked up into Lucas' eyes, "Morning."

Lucas kissed her softly, "Morning pretty girl."

She smiled and dropped her lips to his once more. Lucas brought his hand to her neck, pulling her face closer.

Ten minutes later Haley walked back into the bedroom, a towel wrapped around her wet body, "Somehow I knew Luke would end up in your bed." She shook her head, "And as much as I'd love to let you to continue your 'heartfelt reunion', I need to get dressed." A grumble came from Brooke's bed.

"Go away," Lucas complained against Brooke's lips.

"Nuh uh. Let's go Luke. I guarantee your mother is flipping out right now," Haley demanded holding onto her towel with one hand as she opened the drawer of her dresser. Haley smiled triumphantly when she heard movement on the other side of the room. She glanced towards them; Luke had gotten out of bed and was putting on his shoes while Brooke hung on his back telling him she'd see him later. He kissed her quickly, said goodbye to Haley and practically ran from the room. He had exactly 10 minutes to get home and pretend he was asleep so his mother wouldn't know he was out all night. Brooke sighed and got up from the bed, heading for the door, only to be stopped by Haley blocking the way, "Is it safe to call you Lucas' again?"

"No… yes… no. I don't know," Brooke replied with a groan.

"What do you mean you don't know? You just slept with the guy," Haley complained.

"We didn't sleep together. We just slept in the same bed."

"No little talks about how much you wanted to be with each other?" Haley asked hopefully.

"I didn't say that."

"Did you tell him how you felt? Because if you didn't I'm going to slap you Brooke. He deserves to know, you can't keep doing this to him. It's not fair. He's head over heels for you and you just keep playing with his heart. It's not-" Haley said quickly before Brooke interrupted.

"I thought nosey little Haley would've been up listening to us all night. I guess not." Brooke paused to smirk, "For your information I told him exactly how I felt and he did the same."

Haley jumped, almost dropping her towel as she squealed.

"Okay ew. Keep that thing up," Brooke said referring to the towel, "If you'll excuse me I really need to get in the shower."

Haley smirked and stepped out of her way, "I'm raiding your closet. If you and Luke got lucky with your relationship maybe Nathan and I will have the same."

Brooke gave her a sympathetic look and headed for the bathroom.

* * *

"Did you tell him how you felt?" Peyton asked as she plopped down beside Brooke on the bench outside school.

"What? Huh?" Brooke glanced from Peyton to Haley, "She was in on it too?"

Haley shrugged innocently, "Oops?"

"Yeah we talked, made out, talked some more, fell asleep and got woken up by Ms. Nosey over here," Brooke told Peyton.

"Wait. You slept with him? So you're back together? I told you eating all that ice cream and cake was just going to be a waste of time."

"We didn't… well we did, but we slept. And no. Peyton we're going to go slow, we aren't back together," Brooke replied.

"Don't mess with him Brooke."

"I'm not. I told him I loved him, right now that's all that matters."

Suddenly two hands covered her eyes and a mouth was felt against her ear, "Boo."

Brooke smiled and leaned back to move her eyes off of his hands, "Hey Luke."

"I think the right answer was Ah!" Lucas replied moving his hands away.

"Did your mom flip out on you?" Brooke asked turning around to face him.

"Nah. She walked into my room to wake me up just as I fell onto the bed."

Brooke smiled and stood up, grabbing her things, "We should talk… about last night."

"In Brooke's language that's code for let's go kiss in the corner," Haley mocked with a laugh.

"Real mature," Brooke told Haley giving her a playful smack on the head. "Seriously, we should talk Luke."

Lucas nodded and took Brooke's hand hesitantly. She didn't pull away, rather linked her fingers with his and started to walk away, Lucas following her.

"What did you want to talk about?" Luke asked once they were out of earshot of Peyton and Haley.

"About us. I know what we told each other last night was big, and typically it would lead to us getting back together, but it can't. It doesn't. I'm not ready yet. I'm not ready for fast because I'm not sure if you're going to dump me in a week because I started to bore you like last time."

"I'm not going to do that. I love you Brooke, nobody else."

Brooke stopped walking and turned to face him, "We'll take it slow okay? Not super slow because I can't deal without your kisses, but we'll go slow. Let me build my trust in my own time. But please feel free to help me trust you."

"And how am I supposed to do that?" Lucas asked stopping when she did, facing her as well.

"Don't flirt with other girls, not even if it's Haley and you're just teasing her. No other girls Luke. If we're going to work you're going to have to deal with just me."

"Brooke, you're it. You're all I need." Luke told her, placing a kiss on her cheek, "We should get to class okay?"

"We can be late," Brooke told him as she dropped her lips down onto his. Lucas smiled against her lips and kissed her back.

* * *

It was around ten minutes into first period when Haley threw a piece of paper at Peyton.

"_I told you Brooke meant kissing when she wanted to talk to Luke. Have you seen Nathan?"_

Peyton glanced back at Haley just to make sure it was from her. She glanced around the room; both Brooke and Lucas' seats were empty. She laughed to herself.

"**The little whores. They probably decided to skip. Nathan… doesn't he have Johnson first period?"**

Haley laughed at the note and wrote something quick back, _"Doubt it. They'll be back by second. Yeah. I was hoping to see him this morning. I wanted to talk to him."_

"**Brooke's in my second. Oh, that's why you decided to wear Brooke's clothes!"**

"_How'd you know they were Brooke's?"_

"**Who do you think she drags to the mall?"**

"_Right."

* * *

_

Sure enough when second period came around both Lucas and Brooke were present in their classrooms. Brooke and Peyton were early, sitting at their desks beside each other with a few minutes before the late bell rang.

"Where were you in first period?" Peyton asked her.

"Ditched. Luke and I went to the park and talked."

"You managed that without getting caught leaving campus?"

"I've got skills P. Sawyer," Brooke told her with a laugh.

"Back together yet?" Peyton asked.

Brooke shrugged, "Technically yes." She smiled just as Lucas walked into the classroom. "He looks happy," Peyton commented as Lucas headed towards them. Brooke smiled and put her arm out as Lucas neared her so he could give her a hug.

"Long time no see," He said kissing the side of her head.

"It's been ages," Brooke replied with a laugh.

"What a crime." He kissed her lips gently and moved to go sit in his seat.

Brooke didn't reply, her eyes were glued to the door to the classroom_. 'Great, he's the last person I want in my classes.' _Brooke thought to herself as Peyton started waving her hand in front of her face, "What's with you?"

Brooke nudged her head to the door, "Nathan wannabe over there."

Peyton looked up, "Whoa. Seriously. We should probably keep him away from Haley."

Brooke laughed, "I know him. I met him at Abercrombie before you and Haley pulled your little 'throw Luke at Brooke' stunt. We flirted a little."

Peyton shook her head, "You better tell Luke before he goes all macho man on you."

"Brooke! Hey…"

Damn. Peyton between Brooke and Lucas.

"Hey Ryder," Brooke replied with a smile.

"Who would have guessed you'd be in my classes?" Ryder stated when he reached Brooke.

"Heh, yeah," Brooke replied with a fake laugh.

"At least I've got one pretty face to look at," Ryder replied.

"Yeah. About that…" She didn't get to reply, the bell rang signaling class would begin.

Ryder sat down in an empty seat by Brooke and Peyton. _'This is definitely going to be a great year.'_

Peyton decided that Brooke had enough to worry about with her relationship with Lucas, and the last thing that she needed was Ryder on her back. She took out a sheet of paper and started to write him a little letter.

_Nathan Scott wannabe,  
__Little FYI, that's your new nickname. Get used to it. I'm Peyton. Brooke is my best friend. Just so we're clear, she's taken. She doesn't need you screwing that up. I know she was single when she met you, and you two flirted a little, but that was it. She's taken now so keep your little hands to yourself or we're going to have trouble. They've got a rocky past but they're in love. You do anything to wreck that and I'll have the entire basketball team on your ass._

_Much love,  
__Peyton_

She tossed the piece of paper at him and didn't bother to look at his facial expression or turn to wait for a response. The answer was simple, just stay away from her. Little to Peyton's knowledge, he just gave him all the more reason to mess with them.

* * *

Dun dun dun dun. 


	4. Author's Note

Author's Note: Ahhh! one of these dreaded notes so early? Don't worry I'm not quitting or anything. I'll be in New York for the rest of the week. I'm sorry I had no time to write anything to even give you a short chapter. When I return you'll get plenty more. I know some people liked the journal entry so I'm going to have another one of those possibly in the next chapter.

Ryder is … well a Scott. He's not Felix in disguise though I promise you that. I despised that arrogant loser. I've got some pretty good ideas brewing in my head that I've already run by my best friend for this guy. She seems to like it; my only problem is how to piece it in. I sincerely doubt that you will hate his storyline, you may at first… but things ALWAYS change, especially with me.

CrazyAznChik said something about putting Ryder and Peyton together. I must tell you that was my initial plan. That plan is no longer in affect and will not happen. I happen to love Jake and Peyton together. If I can come up with a good enough plot for them two and to bring Jake AND Jenny home, then Mr. Jegalski will be back in Tree Hill ASAP. Just so you know, Jake will not return home without his beloved daughter. She also said things about Brucas fluff. Trust me when I say there will be plenty of this. I'm a fluff fan. I don't love angst, but I don't hate it. What's a story without any? Brooke and Lucas are my reason for writing this. It wouldn't be a Brucas story if it wasn't. Obviously things are going to turn out the way everyone wants… hopefully.

Feel free to contact me with any other questions or concerns, but for now I'm done blabbing. And if you felt this gave away too much information, my dear you are mistaken.


	5. UPDATE NOTE

Hey guys!

I haven't written on this story in forever, but I haven't forgotten! If you guys want me to keep writing, please let me know!

Brucasx31


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